Blessings

Courtesy of Deviant Art

The beloved threw me for a loop this week. A simple doctor's visit on Monday quickly turned awry. The possibility of him now having some serious health issues were suddenly forced upon us and it unnerved me to my core. The armor of strength I usually wear to protect those I love, I now had to make sure would protect him most of all. Always a very healthy individual, he was unprepared for the news. So was I. How could this be? I tended to all of the preparations and questions with quick precision all the while holding his hand and offering words of encouragement and telling him that everything was going to be alright. I believed it in my heart to be true; him, not so much. It was going to take some work to get his mind in the right place. That first night I waited until he finally slept to allow myself to unravel. My nerves were taut and needed an outlet; a gush of tears later, I picked myself up and continued once again.

"Do not tell anyone what's going on," he warned the following day.

"Of course not," I replied. But, then again, when was the last time I listened to him? I told my family. I have a large family. I have a large, loving, supportive family that loves him as much as they love me. Did he really think I would not utter a word? Sorry, love, you need me, and I need them. It's the only way I can be strong for you and get through this. This time we are not doing it your family's way; this time, we are doing it my family's way. In my tribe, we become stronger in numbers. They came for him and for me; they called him and made him laugh; they gave me words of encouragement and love and told me to be strong. They know he is my Achilles Heel.

A few days and one single important procedure/operation later, he was given a clean bill of health. We all sighed a big sigh of relief and were now overwhelmed with joy. Having heard the good news, he was his old self again joshing around with the medical personnel and being charismatic and charming as is his norm. This is not an effort on his part, it is a trait that comes naturally to him. It is his mother's way.

This was my week. A week that began with dark clouds looming overhead ended with the Sun shining brightly through the panes. I admit I was scared. I prayed that God would had chosen me instead because I can take it. I am strong in this area; he is not. His weaknesses are my strengths and vice versa and that is why we depend so much on each other. I can take a personal hit but have to really fight to find the strength to see a loved one take it. But he has always been there for me and has taken good care of me and now it was my turn even though I was scared inside. Now I know how he has felt and what he has gone through and it is unnerving. It was a momentary peek inside each other's life. And it was just one more thing that melded these two hearts ever closer. This was a week filled with fears but it was lived with gratitude, blessings and faith. And like many times in the past, I again did not falter in my belief in him nor in Him. And my beloved is well and all is good with the world once again.