Reflections....

For Weekend Wordsmith

Winter. One of my favorite seasons. As a growing teen, I loved spending it outdoors chilling myself red to the bone, breathing in that cool, refreshing air that opened up my nasal passages but sometimes constricted my lungs. I was never one for layering or overdressing but I was young and the fact that I was outdoors staying active all the time I suppose made up for that lack.

When I was a young teen I lived next to a small pond where I used to spend my days ice skating to my heart's content. I’d meet up with friends and spend the hours skating, laughing, having races and trying to do tricks that would land us on our backsides more times than we cared to count. I’d come in at dusk with bright red cheeks and frozen to the core but I didn’t care because I loved it and I was having fun.

This was the era before malls became the teenage norm and cells phones and wii and video games existed. This was a time when being outdoors doing activities that kept you fit was the norm and where you began to learn the fine art of negotiating and learning how to be independent and resourceful - key ingredients that would serve you later in life.

There were differences in the way we grew up then vs. the way kids are growing up now. When I think about it, I think we were fortunate and lucky to have grown up in that place in time. Technology is terrific and great, don’t get me wrong, but I believe it took away many of the essential things that were a such a wonderful, beautiful and necessary part of our childhood. When I was growing up life was simple. For example, you knew where you stood with the parents – No meant no and no further discussion would change that final answer; tantrums wouldn't get you anywhere; and, God help you if you dared challenge their "laws." Okay, so they were communists but, hey, it worked. We knew the parameters that we had to fool around in and going outside of those parameters would only bring consequences so don’t say you weren’t warned. And what did this teach us? Respect and probably a healthy dose of fear that kept us in line.

There was no MTV or reality shows or any of the other multitude of shows that today seem intent on planting the seeds of inadequacy in young, still malleable and impressionable minds: I’m not thin enough, I’m not pretty enough; I want nice, expensive clothes and materials things that my idols have and I know I can't afford but I deserve it and so what if I view these things to be the most important things in my life? No. Thankfully we were spared these images and wants during our most vulnerable, growing up times. Television was not a staple of our growing up diet. Little time was spent in front of the boob tube and when we did, it was to watch programs that were age-appropriate and filled with joy and laughter and beautiful lessons to be learned. And what did this teach? Hope and understanding.

There was no wii or Xbox or video games. Yeah, and we did pretty well without them too. We instead thought of games in our heads and recreated them with friends. This honed many skills including a well of creativity – how are we going to get this to work? – to resourcefulness – what are we going to use to make this work? – to negotiation – who’s going to play this or that part? And what did this teach? Again, creativity, resourcefulness and negotiation skills.

There were no cell phones and so when we left the safety of our homes we knew we had to be sensible and mature enough to not get into too much trouble because if we did, we were on our own. This taught us valuable street smart skills. Also, because there were no cell phones when you were outside with your friends you gave those friends your undivided attention – something that is so lacking in today’s techie-advanced world. And what did this teach? Maturity and social skills.

There was no internet to provide us with instant information. Whatever info we needed required a trip to the library. The Encyclopedia was the most used books in my household growing up. Reading was fundamental...remember that? And what did this teach us? Research skills and a love of learning.

There were no malls and the few that were popping up here and there were geared towards the working class. We were never considered part of that economic group to whom they had to advertise. We were kids and kids generally don't have money. And it never entered our parents’ mind to give us extra money to go and spend a day at the mall simply because this is what we wanted and would make us happy. Right. They would've laughed us right out of our deluded skulls and told us to stop dreaming and go outside and play. We didn't like that answer? Too bad, so sad. Our allowances were meager and we had to learn to spend it wisely. Deal with it. What did this teach us? Budgeting.

There were no play dates – you went outside and if your friends were there also, then there’s your play date. If not, oh well, such is life, get over it. And what did this teach us? To not place too much importance on expectations.

We all shared soda from the same can and shared food without worrying about getting someone else’s whatever. We drank from outside water fountains and hoses and didn’t think that this was not good for us. When we were thirsty we went in search of water, simple as that. And what did we learn? To not be phobes and just enjoy life, it's not going to kill you.

When we fell and scraped our knees and elbows, we cleaned it with spit and kept on playing. Unless it was a gushing slash that required stitches - and, of course this was concluded at our own limited and dumb medical discretion - this would not require a special trip home. And what did we learn? That the body heals itself quite naturally and quickly without so much ado.

Yes, these were our growing up years and they were great. And today I long to ice skate once again back in that small pond of my formative years where I would spend my days outdoors, giving my full attention to those things I loved and living life in the moment as it was meant to be lived...this is what I wish for myself this year...this is my goal for 2010